The Authors of the Tabloid Times
Mason Cook
Survivor of the hoaxes and lies, and coming back to fight them.
Mason Cook was a lost soul before he started writing for the Times. Absorbing all of the liberal media lies (such as global warming) and believing them. Then in the back ally of a condominium on a dark and stormy night an old man gave him a copy of the Times and told him the truth. After months of badgering the editorial staff, Mason bribed his way into a writing position and now writes regularly for the Times.
Lucas Hauser
An arsenal of truth fighting the corrupt system, every step of the way.
Lucas Hauser was not a founder of the Tabloid Times, but he quickly got involved in the first edition by revealing government hoaxes and other horrible atrocities against the people as a whole right off the bat. His courageous journalism and extremely accurate reporting has earned him the Yannoiji Award, an award given to only the best journalists in the business. He credits his success to the other contributors of the Tabloid Times, his family and friends, and Franklin Pierce.
Anton Sheridan-Kuchmek
Founder of the greatest news outlet in history, independent news at its best.
Anton conceived of the Tabloid Times in 2010 to deliver true news to the public. Unfortunately, Anton's idea was crushed by the big government liberal agenda without external support. Luckily, four years later, Anton was joined by Matthew and they formed the Tabloid Times as we know it. He's a chief recruiter, and found Dr. Froidni single handedly. There was stiff competition, but we were able to convince him to join our crusade for truth.
Matthew Hauser
Champion of truth, inspiration to all.
Matthew Hauser felt like he was alone. He wasn't buying the liberal brainwash the government has been sending out, but had to pretend to be falling for the cheap lies until he could find someone he could trust. Through various ways of communication, which may or may not have involved Squid Sign-Language, he found Anton Sheridan-Kuchmek. They mastered their journalism skills and made the Tabloid Times. Matthew loves writing for the times, and his pet peeves is when people take the "Times" as a joke. He attributes his success to Mr. Scruff, the Ninja Tuna.